When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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