I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
