lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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