dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
