I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize