it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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