But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
