Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize