So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize