eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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