I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
