also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
