you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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