i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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