WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We got so high we made milksteak
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
