I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
