Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
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