wanna go halves on a baby?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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