we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
