when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
