Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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