Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
