just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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