STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
NoShamevember. You game?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
