did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
