Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
