Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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