Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
