she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i think i have two assholes
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
