Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
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