Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
