I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
