The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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