Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
