belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
