why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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