I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
