Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
