My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Edward fifth and chaser hands
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
