so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
