there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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