then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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