i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Reggie can tackle my bush.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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