You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
