Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Randomize
