You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I just googled if crying burns calories
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
