YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
