i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Randomize
