I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize