Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
