id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Randomize
